My Apologies

I don’t know what to say.
You’re dying and there is nothing I can do about it.
My mere mortal abilities are no match for the will of divine beings.
The cancer growing inside you has handicapped my power to comfort.

I can’t look at you.
The state you’re in pains my heart and my eyes.
The supple flesh that once plumped your face and body are gone.
Your cancer has stolen your body and replaced it with the image of the grim reaper.

I don’t want to be here.
Seeing you in this state is corrupting my memories of you.
The reality that your time left on this earth is limited is starting to set in.
Your cancer is sending every emotion I ever had to the surface and I’m unable to process them.

I can’t do this.
I am not strong enough to bear the burden of my heavy heart.
Being absent and selfish is the only coping mechanism I have left.
The cancer inside you is winning and I can’t bear to watch the massacre.